Five Ways to Handle Holiday Stress Without Losing It

Holiday season can feel like a marathon when you’re a mom, especially when birthdays stack back to back, relatives fill every room, and the to-do list keeps growing. In this episode of The Unsidelined Life podcast, author and host Eileen Noyes, mother of eight, shares how she navigates the most demanding months of her year without spiraling into stress. Her home moves from Thanksgiving straight into a birthday streak that runs until June, often with fourteen or more people staying under one roof.

Rather than letting the pressure push her into frustration, Eileen teaches listeners to approach Proverbs 31:6-7 differently. The passage describes giving strong drink to those in distress so they can forget their troubles. Eileen sees a contrast: let the world numb stress that way. God offers you another way to respond. She breaks down the five tools she relies on to stay steady during chaotic seasons, avoid holiday meltdowns, and teach her children how to handle adversity with grace.

Seeing Stress Through a Different Filter  

Eileen’s most used tool is a simple internal question: In the grand scheme of things, how much does this really matter? She leans on it during moments that could easily turn into tension, especially when holiday expectations are high and the house is full. The clearest example happened during a family road trip to Santa Barbara. Minutes before the first stop, her new teenage driver sliced a tire in downtown LA after turning too close to a curb. With traffic buzzing around them, no spare in the car, and plans suddenly derailed, she had options. She could lash out or she could pause and choose a different reaction.

That split second mattered. Instead of exploding, she viewed the situation as a chance to protect the relationship over frustration. She called AAA, navigated the towing issues, gathered solutions, and turned the entire experience into a lesson on perseverance. Eventually, the family made it to Santa Barbara, enjoyed their time, and her son walked away wiser rather than wounded. This question becomes even more helpful during the holidays when small problems threaten to create big emotions. Late mornings for school, messy rooms, imperfect grades, toys on the floor minutes before company arrives. Most moments don’t carry the weight we give them. Eileen uses this filter as a reset so stress doesn’t take over the atmosphere of her home.

Choosing a Strength Mindset Instead of a Victim Mindset  

The second tool shifts the entire way she approaches difficulty. Instead of viewing stressful moments as attacks, she asks a different question: How is this being done for me instead of to me? Her perspective is anchored in the belief that God works behind the scenes even when circumstances look inconvenient or discouraging. Trials build patience and resilience, and she treats them as opportunities to grow rather than reasons to feel defeated.

This mindset shows up in her self-talk. She thanks God for the continuous favor, even when she can’t see the outcome yet. She reminds herself that something good is forming in the middle of what feels messy. When she speaks truth out loud, her brain begins looking for evidence of it, helping her stay steady rather than spiraling. She also talks about moments when discouragement tried to block her from launching her coaching program. Feelings of insecurity hit out of nowhere, but she recognized the pattern. The enemy often tries to distract or unsettle you right before a breakthrough. Instead of quitting, she pushed forward, reached out to people, posted boldly, and within days, had clients. That momentum confirmed her direction and strengthened her confidence.

Speaking What You Desire, Not What You Fear  

Words shape the atmosphere in a home, especially during crowded holiday weeks. Eileen encourages moms to speak what they hope for rather than what they see. Complaining strengthens negative patterns, while thankfulness shifts your attention toward solutions and peace.

She practices speaking faith even before results show up. When stress rises, she says things like:

“Thank you Lord that even though this is hard, You are doing something bigger.”
“Thank you that You are building me up through this.”
“Thank you that I can choose a good attitude here.”

This small discipline, used in tense moments, shifts the tone of the entire household. Instead of feeding stress, it creates calm and expectation.

Here’s a simple way she applies this tool:

• Notice the complaint forming

• Stop mid-sentence

• Replace it with gratitude or truth

• Let your brain start looking for the good instead of the bad

Over time, this becomes a new default during chaotic seasons.

Creating Space and Breaking Tasks into Small Pieces  

Eileen uses two practical strategies to stay ahead when her house fills with family: extra morning time and the process of elimination. She wakes up around four in the morning, a rhythm she feels God nudged her into. Those early hours before anyone else stirs give her space to pray, tidy, put in laundry, prep dinner ingredients, and set the tone for the entire day. When the house eventually wakes up, she’s not starting from behind. Even ten or fifteen minutes of early quiet can make holiday chaos feel more manageable.

The second strategy is the process of elimination. Instead of staring at a pile of responsibilities and feeling overwhelmed, she breaks everything into quick wins. What is the fastest thing she can get off her plate? That becomes the first step. She teaches her kids to do the same with messy rooms or stressful tasks.

A messy room becomes:

• Pick up all trash

• Put away dolls or toys

• Reset one small area at a time

By shrinking the task, stress shrinks with it. Momentum replaces overwhelm.

Your Holiday Season Can Look Different  

Stress will show up this season. Plans will shift, messes will happen, and expectations will compete for your energy. But Eileen reminds listeners that you have options. You don’t have to react the way the world does when life feels heavy.

You can protect relationships over irritation.
You can believe God is working even when the moment feels inconvenient.
You can choose your words.
You can give yourself extra margin.
You can break any overwhelming moment into simple steps.

These tools help you stay steady so you don’t lose your peace, your joy, or your connection with your family. They help you create memories of working through challenges together instead of memories of holiday meltdowns.

If this episode encouraged you, listen to the full conversation on The Unsidelined Life and step into this season with confidence, calm, and a new way of handling stress.

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